(Or, “No Hope, Jordan Leigh & Rachel, there is no Todd Daily”)
I had been praying for something for nearly every day for 509 days. That’s a long time.
Some days, my prayers were so intense that I cried and other days I felt like I was just going through the motions. On most of those days I felt, quite honestly, like God wasn’t even listening to me. Because no matter how I prayed and no matter what I did, it just seemed like He was silent on the whole issue. And it wasn’t one of those, no not now silences, it was silent silent.
Not a word.
Not a single word.
And it’s amazing how you can start to totally doubt just about EVERYTHING when you feel like God isn’t listening to you. You begin to wonder if He’s hearing anything you say. Question everything. Trust nothing. Insecurities abound. Hopelessness flows freely.
Gosh it’s tough being me some days.
Then on day 497 (no I’m not that good – I use www.timeanddate.com/) I was driving some friends, John & Lisa Gotz, from Florence back to Columbia. They are missionaries in Belize and, good heavens if anyone’s going to be full of wisdom on all things God, surely seasoned missionaries are, right?! So I posed the question to them, “What do you do if you pray and pray and PRAY for something and it seems like God is ignoring your prayers?”
I figured I’d initially get the pat answer of God answers prayers in one of 3 ways, “No, yes and not now.” But you gotta trust me on this, there was silence from God (or so I thought). Not a single no, yes or even a not now. So I deflected that answer by showing off my God-knowledge and saying that I knew the 3-ways answer and it was none of those.
So after a few moment s of silence, during which I’m thinking, “THIS IS GONNA BE GOOD! “ John finally says, “Huh, I dunno.”
Then, John asks, “Are you talking to Todd Daily about this?”
Todd Daily, WHO IS TODD DAILY? Will he have the answers to my questions? Does he know what God has in store for me and this situation? IS TODD DAILY SINGLE??
Turns out, I need to buy some new Q-Tips. What John actually said was, “Are you talking to God daily?”
Well DUH! Of course I was!! That’s part of the problem!! I’m talking to Him daily and He’s not talking back!
Then John so wisely says, “Well there ya go, Alice. God will answer, in His time. But maybe, just maybe, right now He’s enjoying this time with you. He’s enjoying this relationship you’re building with Him.”
Huh… well I hadn’t thought about that (that’s why they’re missionaries and I’m not). I guess my relationship with God outweighed my timing on an answer. Hearing that, accepting that and soaking that in made all the difference in the world. And it made getting the answer on day 509 a wee bit easier.
(Oh and FYI – there are about 7 Todd Daily’s on Facebook. I wonder if any of them are single…)
3 days ago