To The Owners of All Public Establishments

I am NOT a germophobe. But there are certain things just give me the willies.

• Roaches in my house (well in my food, too).

• Wet water (that’s water you step in while wearing socks).

• Getting served fish heads for dinner (ok, so that happened like ONCE in my life – obviously I have a hard time letting things go).

• Having to touch a bathroom handle after washing my hands and knowing that there’s a good chance that someone before me DID NOT wash their hands before touching that same handle.

Think about it.

EEEEWWWWW!

Thanks to Matt Lauer I have learned to always take an extra towel after washing my hands and place that towel between the offending handle and my now clean hands.

Here’s where you come in, owners-of-all-public-establishments:

If you refuse to have a trash can some where near the door I will drop that towel on the floor.

Deal with it.

Or get a trash can near the door.

Or get a door that can be pushed open without have to touch a handle.

Ok?